An Appreciation: Cathy Coakley, 1950-2019

The Wildcat Community Remembers Cathy

Cathy Coakley, a cherished member of the UNH athletics community, passed away on Sunday night, March 3. A Celebration of Life in honor of Cathy will be held on Sunday, March 17 at 6 p.m. in Lundholm Gymnasium in the UNH Field House. St. Patrick's Day was her favorite holiday.

DURHAM, N.H. – Cathy Coakley - athlete, former coach and then coordinator of student athlete development at the University of New Hampshire for more than a decade – always put the best interests of her student-athletes first, and always acted in the best interests of those student-athletes.

So it was that Coakley decided that Katie Audino, then a sophomore field hockey player and member of UNH's Student Athlete Advisory Committee, was the best choice to represent the school at the America East SAAC meetings in the spring of 2017.

Audino was not nearly so sure.

"The first time she mentioned it I told her, 'I don't think I'm the person you want for this,'" Audino said. "I told her I didn't think I'd be great at it."

Coakley persisted. Audino resisted.

Finally, Coakley – a healthy determined streak being among her many endearing qualities – won out.

Audino, now the co-president of SAAC as a senior along with Nelson Thomas of the UNH football team, went to the league SAAC meetings in Boston and had a blast.

When she got back to campus she went to the Field House and walked into Coakley's office.

"I wanted to give her an update and she had this smirk on her face before I had said anything," Audino said. "She asked, 'So did you like it?' I said 'I loved it.' Cathy said, 'I knew you'd say that.'"

Cathy Coakley was right again: She had done right by her student-athletes once again.

"She was stubborn, but always a good stubborn," Audino said. "And she was right 99 percent of the time."

The UNH athletics family took a major hit and lost one of the good ones earlier this week when Cathy Coakley, Class of 1972, long a battler for and supporter of Wildcat athletes, died after a long fight with illness.

Coakley continued to work through her sickness.

"I was talking to someone in the athletics department today and they said some people tried to get her to retire a while ago," Audino said. "They said, "She wouldn't give up on you kids and SAAC.'"

Coakley managed to relate well to young athletes, said Audino and others connected to UNH.

"She just had such a love for UNH and such a love for student-athletes," Audino said. "She wanted every single student to be successful. Whether it was someone in field hockey like myself, a diver on the swim team or a football player, no matter who it was she wanted the best for all of us. Personally, I think that's what kept her coming to work all the time. I don't know if I've known someone ever in my life who has actually put their heart and soul into wanting the best for every student and who's made sure they did everything they could to make that happen like Cathy did."

Similar comments, thoughts and stories were shared in and around the extended UNH athletics community this week – many with heavy hearts and a few through teary eyes, but plenty with smiles, too – as memories and condolences poured in on social media and through other sources from scores of the countless people Cathy Coakley touched and moved through her life.

There were stories of her talking about the adventures of her beloved and spoiled dogs, the late Sneakers and current Simon. Memories of her distinctive C-H-C license plate in front of the Field House. And of the laughs and good times shared with old friends at women's basketball Alumni Days, including this past January.

"When I think of Cathy, I just think of how she's probably the most genuine, wholesome trustworthy person I've ever worked with, been around, hung out with, played golf with," said longtime UNH field hockey coach Robin Balducci. "She just was a wonderful soul. Everything was positive. She always wanted to help. And she always wanted to fly under the radar, never wanted the limelight. It was always roll up your sleeves and do the work, you know. I remember her lugging boxes upon boxes of the "Soles for Souls" campaign herself. Loading her car. That's just Cathy."

"Old school" by nature, Coakley was a stickler for detail, whether it was in arranging her desk, or insisting how student-athletes acted and presented themselves in public.

Whether it was showing up at the precise appointed time to deliver a student who needed to do community service to Jean Mitchell – "He (or she) is all yours" – she'd declare after making clear the guidelines ahead of time, or whether it was chasing down student-athletes delinquent in returning the textbooks that had been purchased for them, pursuant to NCAA rules.

"She was fantastic in her role," said UNH football coach Sean McDonnell. "She cared so much about all the student-athletes. It was always fun to see her interact with kids because she always wanted to get them to do better than they were doing, for people and with people, and all those things. She just had a tremendous ability to bring that out in people and I thought that was pretty special"

Balducci and track & field coach Jim Boulanger, among others, knew Coakley from her earlier stint as an assistant women's basketball coach. Boulanger went back further and worked with her at Oyster River High School where she taught and coached the girls basketball team to a couple of state championships after graduating from UNH.

"Just a good person," Boulanger said. "A real good basketball coach and the girls loved her. Everything was about the kids, whether it was with coaching or teaching."

Director of athletics Marty Scarano didn't know Coakley when the department decided it needed to find someone to work closely with its student-athletes not only with life skills, but in getting out into the community and being involved with the public.

Coakley was working at James Madison University at the time and her name soon came up.

"We interviewed her and two things became very clear," Scarano said. "A, she had an enormous passion for UNH and B, she was exactly the right person for the job. She was so supportive of her student-athletes, she was fiercely loyal to her student-athletes. She set very high standards for student-athletes to live up to. But she wouldn't ask anyone to do anything she wouldn't do herself."

UNH athletics had found its woman.

She will be greatly missed.

"She did a helluva lot of great things for this athletic department," McDonnell said.

"She was just a wonderful human being," Balducci said. "You couldn't help but enjoy her company. I think of all the basketball games I'd go to and sit in the corner of the bleachers. I'd always go and sit next to Cathy. She'd be stamping her foot and worrying about the rebounding and whatever was going on because of her passion for basketball. The other thing I'm going to really miss is that inevitably I would turn around at Memorial Field during our games and she'd be up behind the bench by the wall. That I'm going to miss - because it was always wonderful to see her there."

Remembering Cathy Coakley:

"I worked with Cathy through SAAC all four years at UNH, becoming more and more involved each year, ending as SAAC President as a senior. Cathy was undoubtedly one of the brightest lights in the Field House. She cared about nothing more than her student-athletes and always strived to make both our campus and the Durham community better places. Cathy and her warm smile will be missed so much, but I know there are so many Wildcats who will cherish the memories made with her."

                                        Mimi Borkan, '17 soccer alum, MBA candidate and grad assistant in athletics department at Providence College

"Obviously to come back here and work alongside her was pretty great, just to be able to not only be her little mentee, but now we were going to be peers. As soon as I came I gave her a hug and we just got to work. It was pretty cool to get to work alongside her, pick her brain on a couple of different things and have conversations not just about work itself, but life in general. Cathy was just a special spirit and looked out for you. Cathy was definitely someone who kept me inspired and motivated and pushed me to do the best things. I'm grateful to have had the opportunity to work with her and work alongside her and learn some very key tips on life."

Jordan Long, '10 football alum, mentored by Cathy Coakley, returned to UNH as assistant athletic director for academic support services in November, 2018

"Cathy and I met when I was in high school (1981), I was a camper and she was my first camp coach. She made an immediate impression on me for her passion for coaching and teaching basketball and her love for UNH. I always wanted to go to UNH after that first week of camp. Cathy was a great mentor. I was lucky to become colleagues with her at Northeastern and through all these years we've became good supportive friends. I am grateful for all the conversations we've shared. The UNH community has lost a great person who was so passionate about UNH. Rest in peace my UNH pal!"

                                      Karen Pinkos, Class of 1988, UNH basketball alum, women's basketball coach at SNHU

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